I want to share my thoughts on the importance of having a good starting point.

Let’s imagine a client who is having a tough time. They feel overwhelmed and unable to sleep. They struggle with work and cannot be there for family and friends.

Here, a hypnotherapist or any other therapist has several choices. We can go down a general, problem-focused road, discussing the potential origins of the problems (a therapist might quickly rush through the literature in their heads, categorising the client into a neat box and thinking of ways of helping based on the textbook), the severity of the problem, the impact this has on loved ones. The unethical therapist might start to relax and think about how much money they can make from this client. Let’s face it: Therapists can be unethical, too.

However, in a Solution-Focused approach, after acknowledging the client’s difficulties, I’d ask, “Is this something you would like to change?” If the client says yes, we have permission to proceed. I’d then ask, “What would you like to experience instead of [insert problems here]?” After some initial “I don’t know” responses (typical when we’re down), the client might say something like, “I’d like to face the world again and enjoy my life again.”

I might ask, “What difference would this make?” a couple of times again, and we might end up with a perfect starting point for a Solution Focused conversation. After a few minutes, the client expressed what they wanted to have instead of the problem and how that would impact their lives and those of their loved ones. To conclude the first part of the session (which might take 3 or 10 minutes, depending on the client), I summarise what’s said and move to the next part.

I want to emphasise a couple of points. I always must ask for permission and seek clarity if needed. And I can’t assume anything. That would go against the ethics of Solution-Focused practice. Since the client is the expert on their lives, and I’m merely a helping professional trying to help them achieve the state they want to be due to our work, I cannot move ahead until we have a common understanding of what we are working on.

The second point is quite simple but oh so important. I’m sure we don’t have to be linguists to understand that these are two profoundly different sentences: “I’m overwhelmed, I can’t sleep, I’m struggling with work, and I’m unable to be there for my family and friends”.

“I’m overwhelmed, I can’t sleep, I’m struggling with work, and I’m unable to be there for my family and friends, AND I would like to change this.”

The first sentence shows a person feeling down amid a struggle. It’s static, a flat statement of facts, with no inherent motivation.

The solution-focused world sees nothing as permanent, and we choose to accept the fundamental truth of impermanence. Nothing is permanent, not even the problematic state, and we fully embrace reality’s dynamic, fluid nature.

This is why the person behind the second sentence is entirely different. This simple addition transforms the sentence from a passive acceptance of the status quo to an active invitation for positive change. They are thinking of change.

Nobody knows how the future, a different future, where the problems are not present/not as present, will look to that person. After a few minutes of talking, we all know that the client wants to change, and it would make a huge difference in various ways. We have the rest of the session/sessions, plus hypnosis, to discuss.

The third point is that this is entirely based on the client’s hopes, not my hopes from our work. There is no point where I give the client a suggestion or a helpful hint about the area they “need” to work on. This shows the utmost respect and trust in the client’s abilities, showing them that we believe in them knowing what will be the most useful for them.

Ultimately, the Solution Focused approach reminds us that therapy is not about imposing our assumptions or theories onto clients. Instead, it’s a collaborative journey where we guide individuals to uncover their innate wisdom and desired outcomes. By starting with permission, embracing life’s impermanence, and trusting in our client’s expertise in their own lives, we open the door to transformative change. The profound difference between stating a problem and a desire for something better is the catalyst that sets this robust process in motion. As hypnotherapists, we hold space for that pivotal shift, providing compassionate listening and insightful questioning that allows each client to author their path forward. Because, in the end, the solutions they seek have been within them all along—we help them give voice to those dreams and take the first steps toward making them a reality.

That’s all for today; I hope you find this useful. Please ask any questions or leave a comment or contact me directly.